Signed, One Embarrassed American

Really, Washington? Really?!

The Ultimate Facepalm.

Let me come down to what appears to be the level we have now reached.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!

Now, we've brought to our world stage a man whose name is actually "Anthony Weiner," which might be comedic gold or playground torture, but it is a national god damn embarrassment because this man is known-- not for his brilliant work as a former Congressman-- but for sending out pictures of his penis. Dick pics!

DICK! PICS!!

Our Republican front runner might have some good and some terrible ideas, but we do know he likes to "grab 'em by the pussy" -- not his ideas or even his enemies, mind you, but women. Women! 

By. The. Pussy.

Oh, yes, you did. You did!

Our Democratic front runner... where are we with her again? You've lost me. You've just lost me. You've come at her so many times, spent so much money (mine and theirs) and so much energy (you're burning me out) trying to bring her down, DOWN, that I don't even know what we're doing now-- I mean, other than the male organ of "sexual relations." I know what we are NOT doing.  

• Beyond the frightening amount of money the average renter will be sending away on the first of every month, the truly scary part of this situation is that the math actually adds up. This steady rent increase is the rational result of a series of economic trends that have made this moment unique in the history of American housing.
• Here are some other troubling anecdotal signals on the housing market:.. All of these signals raise a serious question: Are we getting closer to another housing meltdown that will once again damage your investment portfolio?
• There’s nowhere in America where two parents earning the federal minimum wage, which amounts to about $30,000 per year collectively, can make enough to support a family of three or four...
•  U.S. prices for top brand-name drugs jumped 127 percent between 2008 and 2014, compared with an 11 percent rise in a basket of common household goods... 
•  No quote, just childcare. By state.

Notice a theme? Any ambiance in particular?

What the fuck, Washington? Seriously, what the actual fuck? Snap out of it! You Are God Damn Embarrassing US!